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  • Jimmy Broccoli

This Is how I Prefer Him

I throw plastic chew toys down at him as he crawls across the floor

he is a handsome, young adult man –

Shirtless, jeans uncomfortably tight – he looks up at me with his puppy-dog eyes

… this is how I prefer him


he can ride in the backseat of my Bentley

he just can’t touch anything – if he does, I’ll bind his hands with rope

My Bentley is golden

I’ll untie his hands only so he can fetch his leash

It’s time for us to go out for a walk on the town


I tell him to bark, and he does – because he’s a good boy

And by barking I know he is thankful -

“See”, I tell him – “here are all of our friends – they’re happy to see us”

We walk in the door of the club and the confetti falls colorfully from the ceiling -

he’ll drink out of a bowl on the nightclub’s wooden floor

…soon we will be dancing – soon - after I give him his cocaine


Our friends laugh at all of my jokes – they all think I’m over-the-top and hilarious

he looks handsome on a leash with puppy-dog eyes looking up at me…

“Come – come – dance with me and our friends”, I say

“Rise – rise from all-fours – and dance – dance, I say!”

“Because you’re a good boy – you can have some more cocaine”, I tell him -

…the cocaine is kicking in and we’re all elegantly wasted

Seemingly out of nowhere he begins to bark

“Good boy” I say, as I place my hand within his


During the early morning hours, the chauffeur brings the glorious Bentley to the front of the club –

We do just one more line to say goodbye

The chauffeur has arrived…


It’s playtime once again in his playroom

I, again, throw down the toys he is to play with

he’s handsome and young, and so very attentive -

perhaps I’ll keep him for a little longer


I am sugar and I am coins made of fine metal

The crowd wants to sit on my designer couch in my enormous living room

They sit in their homes and wait for my invitation to arrive –

Then – for the invited exclusive few - the music will play in our ears -

A symphonic harmony to a disco beat

We’ll snort lines of cocaine from my bathroom’s golden counter

While he plays in his playroom with his chew toys -

“You handsome little doggie”, I say as I peer down at him while he plays in his little playroom

“You can have some cocaine – you’ve been a good boy”, I say

We breathe in the night as if it were off a mirror on the golden table

he’s handsome and so very young



Maybe I’ll bark too, so I can sound like you

I’ll chew on rubber toys, here for all of the small boys

I’ll crawl on the ground and, without permission, won’t make a sound

Together we’ll play and snuggle close, perhaps I’m being verbose

You’d be like me and sit on the golden chair

You might no longer see me or pretend I’m not there

We’ll roll around together, playing like little doggies

And be so tongue-tied, we’ll no longer be able to rhyme



But, this is how I prefer him…


Him on all fours

I creep up behind him and he’ll hear me roar

he is my little chew toy lean and young

I speak to him as if he’d understand my mother tongue

The chauffeur brings the Bentley around once again

We’ll soar off into the air like a cocaine airplane

We’ll be so high, we won’t remember how to rhyme


“Bark, little doggie –

yes, you can have some cocaine -

I said bark! I said bark, bark little doggie!”


…This is how I prefer him

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